prayer request por favour!

Ok, first of all, apologies for being slack with my blogging!…It is a combination of being busy and being lazy!…the last few weeks have been pretty good!…I had visits from my parents and two friends, Robyn from Eastbourne and Rhonda from Oz, who i have not seen for 7 years….so it was AMAZING to spend time with her!…so over the weeks they were here, I took some time off to be a tourist!..looking round museums and cathedrals as well as white water rafting..which was  ace, and horse back riding…which was hilarious!!…So anyway, once all my visitors left, i was very worried about how I was going to be emotionally, but God is good, and I coped pretty well and have got back into my normal work routine without too much worry!…It continues to be tough, but I am able to identify that it is the language that causes me the biggest problem!…I just get so frustrated and dispondent cos I feel so useless.But interestingly, the last few days I have really felt God’s presence and just felt a lot more chilled out about being here!..and am even starting to believe I am of some use ( only in God’s strength!!).

Today in the hospital, I met a 2 year old boy who acquired a brain injury from an accident…He had a massive impact on me and it has left me feeling pretty helpless. I think this is because I used to work with children with acquired brain injury and I have seen that if a child is to have any hope of a decent recovery, they need a high level of care and treatment…something this boy is just not recieving in the state hospital!…His whole body is contracted, so much so that it is like moving a plank of wood!!…he has pressure sores, he is scarily under weight, he is being given fluids without having had an assessment by a speech and language therapist, to assess his swallow reflex, making him a high risk of getting a chest infection, and I really believe he is not strong enough to fight a chest infection!…He needs daily physio, OT and speech therapy, needs splints for his hands, legs, feet!  and it is just not available to him!…the other difficult thing for me is he and his mum only speak Quechua, so it is very difficult for me to communicate with them!..At the moment, he is not responding to any stimulation and we are unsure how much he is understanding!..I encouraged his mum ( through an interpreter) to keep speaking to him, presuming he can uderstand, and to keep asking him, if he can understand to blink at us!…I am pretty sure he can hear, but just needs his brain to ‘wake up’ a bit more…So in the absence of any formal therapy and extensive knowledge from the nurses, I endevour to try and do what I can with this boy…i provided him with ‘hand splints’ today, by using 2 small plastic shampoo bottles, just to help stretch his hands, and with the help of an interpreter, i will try to encourage his mum to do some gentle massage with him. I am also off to buy him some toy that plays music to try and to stimulate him more!…So with all this in mind, I would appreciate it if you could pray for him ( his name is Daniel!) and for his mum…as she has already lost 2 other children!!!…Also pray that I can use what skills I learnt working with brain injured children, but also that I manage my frustrations at the limitations…both my own limitations and the lack of resources for this poor boy!

thanks…sorry that was longer than i was planning!!!..also sorry no photos!

Hablo espanol…..ish!!!

Well, following nearly 3 months of spanish lessons, i am now considered competent to be officially let loose full time to speak to the Peruvians. I had a Spanish exam last weekend and passed it..wahoo!!…although i only got 51% and needed 50% to pass…so the saying ‘skin of your teeth’ comes to mind!! ..so I am now able to get more involved in the projects that I came here for – CORASON, an afterschool kids club in a poor community in Cusco, hospital visiting and children’s home visiting, although, I have been doing this for a few weeks now as I go on a Saturday morning, so did not interfere with school!!

The hospital visiting is the thing that proably has the most impact on me…i wish i could say it was the other way round, but there are so many needs there, it is hard to see that I can make any difference!…But actually I am realising that I need to focus on individual needs rather than the bigger picture, and that playing a game or just chatting with a child who is scared and unwell and sometimes without their mum or dad there, makes a HUGE difference to them. There are so many sad situations, but people here are so resiliant and somehow cope with any situation thrown at them. It is great to be able to go in to a ward and put a smile on kids faces, just by giving them colouring sheets and pencils or playing connect 4 with them! These children are often in pain, scared and sometimes confused by what is going on..it is so sad..what is even sadder is the kids and parents who only speak Quechua…this is the old Inka language which is still vastly used in the countryside outside the city. For these people, communication is so difficult as the hospital staff generally do not speak it and they do not supply an interpreter like they do in the UK, so kids and parents have no idea what is happening to them, or how serious a situation is, or if they are going to get better!! Myself and Jenny Brown are looking towards doing some basic bible teaching and talking about Jesus to some of the children in the hospital aswell, as most of them will know nothing of Him or even have heard of Him….again, there are huge limitations here with the Quechua kids as there is very little bible material in Quechua, so we are going to have to think moer about that! Today I heard of a very sad story where a one year old child in a Quechua village became unwell, and the mother believed he had been given a bad spirit by a dog when it barked at him, so instead of taking him to the hospital, as she was advised, she went to find a witch doctor to clean him of the spirit. Sadly, and unsurprisingly, this did not help and the little boy died!…Apparently this is so very common in these villages!! So terrible!

So, everyday, I am challenged when I see such distressing situations, that I feel bad when I complain about a bit of homesickness…God wants me here for now, so, this is where I will stay and just try and help these people in anyway I can…no matter how small!!!

Still here!!!

Well, would you believe it…I am nearly half way through my time in Peru!..I am praying the second half is less ‘bumpy’ than the first half!….Apologies for not updating my blog for ages,,,various reasons for this, but the main one is laziness!!!!

So since my last update, I have continued to be challenged in many ways…language, lonliness, homesickness and general questioning in what on earth am I doing here..as I have felt pretty useless. But I am still here and I despite all that, there are some wonderful moments I am experiencing, amd lovely friendships I am forming, so I am looking to those more and more for encouragement! I think the biggest thing for me in the last few weeks has been my trip to Bolivia! It was a bit of a last minute thing as i realised 2 weeks ago, my tourist visa was about to expire, so my only option was to head to the nearest border, stay out the country for 24 hours, then return, with another 3 months on my passport!..This was something I really did not want to do alone, butdue to the short notice, I had little choice!..So I used it as an opportunity to whole-heartedly put my trust in God to help me through the weekend…not only did He not let me down, but He blessed me in so many ways, and i felt such a closeness to Him all weekend. I know now that God wanted me to do this trip, not alone, but with Him..and what an amazing travelling companion He was! En route to Bolivia, I was looking out the window of the bus and saw some mountains in the distance, which I was admiring, then in the distance, I saw some huge snow peaked mountains, that were so big they towered over the other mountains, making them look almost flat and insignificant..in that moment, I felt God tell me that my worries and anxieties are like the first lot of mountains…they look huge and overwhelming,BUT, put them next to God,and He towers over them, overshadowing them and making them and insignificant…..Amazing!…and what is even more amazing is that same God who created those mountains, cares about what I worry about, and wants the best for me..forever!…brilliant

Anyway….sorry a bit of a boring blog..but figured it was time to put pen to paper…or rather finger to keyboard!…I will try not to leave it too long until the next blog!

Oh by the way, FYI, I had more problems getting OUT of Peru, than I did getting back into the country..but that is another story!!

A new hoodie!?

Well, it has been a tough few weeks!…bloggees (people who read my blog…is that a word…hope so, it is cool!), may remember that my first blog talked about my Latin Link hoodie that said ‘Boldly Go’ on the back!…Well I have been wanting to get a new hoodie with the logo ‘Sheepishly come back’…because I have felt far from bold, and all I have wanted to do was return to good ole blighty!…I say ‘was’ because today I am ok!…who knows how long for, but I am really starting to learn to live in the now and not worry about tomorrow!…So for now, I will stop looking for somewhere to get a new print on my hoodie and enjoy where I am at, and try and focus on what God wants me to do!

The spanish is coming along slowly, I am now having one to one tutoring which I am really enjoying, and my teacher, who, I guess would consider herself an atheist , is asking lots of questions about my faith and how i became a Christian and seems to be taking  real interest which is exciting…the down side to this is that this is all being done in Spanish, as it is part of the lesson..and I am not allowed to talk in English in my lesson..so it really will be a miracle if she becomes a Christian through it, cos I do not really know what I am saying!!!

On Good Friday, I went and helped to provide a lunch for parents of children who are in the local hospital…now those who know me…do not panic, i was not involved in the cooking….the idea was to bless them, not punish them!!….it was a lovely afternoon!..A small marquee was put up in a filed next to the hopsital and families were able to just come and eat and have some time out!…I took some photos and will attempt to put them on here…so if you can see them then ‘yay’..I succeeded..but if not, then ‘boo’ i failed!

afflicted but NOT crushed!

So this last week has been a little up and down…more down than up….if only the nature walks I go on are more like that!!…Anyway, there has been nothing specific that has made it difficult, just feeling a bit homesick and finding the spanish challenging!….but thankfully I have a teacher who is patient!….towards the end of last week I was really questioning why I am here…those who know my journey, know that it is without doubt, God’s plan for me, but when in the thick of it and everything is so difficult because of the language,and I am so tired all the time it is really hard to work out how on earth I will be of any use to anyone, and really just wanted to come home!…I went to church on Sunday with a bit of a heavy heart, wondering what the point was, as I would not understand anything and it would  just lead to frustration, but I prayed during the worship that God would speak to me during the preach, even through my limited spanish…..and He did!!…No i did not suddenly become fluent in spanish ( still waiting for that miracle!!!), but i was able to understand that the preacher was talking about the peace of God!…and the scriptures he used included Romans 5 v1: ‘Therefore, since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ’; Philippians 4 v 7: And the peace of  God which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus”;2 Corinthinthians 4v8 ‘We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed, perplexed but not driven to despair’. There were more scriptures, but these really stood out for me!…particularly the last one…as I do feel crushed, and driven to despair but i know that is not the truth!..as I am still here alive and well ( no idea how, with some of the bus rides i have experienced!)….and it helped me to realise that the peace of God is with me…it is just I have a tendency to go on my feelings sometimes more than the truth!..it has taken a few ‘freedom’ courses for me to learn to not go on my feelings..yet i still do it at times! ( note to self: sort it out!!!). So after this wonderful revelation I would love to say everything is hunkydory, and i wake up, leap out of bed and have a wonderful spring in my step as i walk, but alas, this is not the case…but what I do have is the peace of God, that surpasses all understanding, and the knowledge that I am in the place that God wants me to be at this time, therefore, in the words of D:ream…’things can only get better’…I have hope that altho I am afflicted i am not crushed, and that altho i am perplexed ( a lot!!!), i am not driven to depair!…..sadly the same can not be said for my teacher!…please pray for her!!

no hablo espanol!!!

So, I have been in Cusco for nearly 2 weeks!!..the first week was mainly getting used to the altitude, which on the whole, has been generally ok for me….i still get very breathless going up stairs and hills and feel like i am gonna pass out, no different to at home really!!…the good thing is, here i have an excuse!!

I started language school on Monday, and by Wednesday I realised i am never gonna be able to speak Spanish!!… After my lesson on Wednesday, i felt so deflated cos I am by far the worst in my class and i just felt like a complete failure!…and as I sat on the bus on the way home, i began to cry..and then, when i thought it could not get any worse…Lionel Ritchie’s ‘say you, say me’ comes on the radio…and I kid you not..this is what went through my head…’well i can say ‘you’ and i can say ‘me’ in spanish and that is about it’!!…i then cried some more!….On reflection, I realise i was possibly a little over tired at this point!!

 

Today, however, has been much more positive!….I actually understood most of the lesson today…Praise God!!…I prayed loads this morning and en route to the lesson that I would work in God’s strength and not my own and everytime I struggled in the lesson I just looked to God and I genuinely felt a renewed strength…that said, I am not quite fluent just yet!!!….but better than I was yesterday!!….I did consider changing my prayer to ask that God give all Peruvians fluency in english….but I have a feeling that will fall on deaf ears!!!

Well, it is 4 weeks ago that I left good ole blighty and here are a few things I am missing….central heating ( it gets sooo cold here at night!), chocolate ( of the cadbury’s variety!), long hot showers, the Chris Moyles show, Vivo cafe, carpet, and being able to get into my car instead of a 15-seater minibus full of approximatley 30 people!…Having said that,…here is what I love about being in Peru…the fact that they think it is ok to cram 30+ people into a 15 seater minibus!!, no chocolate ( really will not do me any harm!), the lovely warm, thick blankets!, the peruvian people, being with Jenny, Roland, Sammy and Ben, the ‘Meeting Place’ ( my new Vivo cafe!) and most importantly, my increased dependance on God, and His blessings that I am receiving while here!! Praise God!!!

who stole the sun??!!

So am now safely in wet, cold and cloudy Cusco after what has been an eventful week!!…The Latin Link conference was in the most amazing surroundings in the mountains just outside Lima!.. It was an old convent and just so peaceful and stunning!..although not peaceful at 11.50pm on Monday night when we experienced an earth tremor!…We had been told that day what to do should an earthquake occur, and one of the key things is to NOT PANIC!!…i decided against this advice and felt panicking was exactly what was  necessary!…it is actually an area i am very gifted in, particularly at the moment, so i thought i should put my gift to use!!!!..Anyway, all was ok, and all the long termers seemed quite unfazed by it so thatwas good enough for me!

After the conference, Jenny, Roland and the boys and me had a few days in sunny, hot Lima, before heading torainy, cold Cusco! This was great as i got to spend a bit more time with one of the other new ‘striders’ who is going to be based in Lima and visit one of the projects she is going to be involved in. It was in a kidsbible club in a shanty town, near Liam airport. the kids were great, so friendly and enthusiastic in hearing and learning about God!..when they did worship they had no musical instruments, but they did not need them cos they sung and clapped with such enthusiasm and volume..it was amazing to see..and the living conditions were so basic!…I forgot to mention that the night before this visit, we had a hariy moment on a motorway, when the tyre on the car i was travelling in, burst, forcing us to have to pull over on the slip road ( they do not seem to have hard shoulders)..and decide whether it would be safer to wait in the car, where cars could head straight into the back of us or wait outside the car, thus allowing the cars to hit us straight on!!!….of course, this gave me another opportunity  to put my gift of  panicking into practice!..what a special gift!!….we opted to sit in the car and pray…and within minutes our prayers were answered, as a very nice man in a van ( i guess a bit like an AA man but nicer, cos we did not even have to call him, he just appeared!) showed up with some reassuring flashing lights so we could be clearly seen and therefore minimise the chances of getting squashed by a reckless Peruvian driver ( from my observations so far, all Peruvian drivers are reckless!!), and he changed the tyre and we were on our way!!

So Saturday afternoon, after our time at the shanty town,  I felt it only right that i head to Pink Berry with Anna (the other strider),to enjoy a frozen yoghurt with cheesecake bites one last time before i left Lima, but sadly, this was not meant to be!…We did make it to Pink Berry but as we did I  got the feeling that i was not going to be well!..and that feeling was spot on!..I shall spare you the details, but lets just say frozen yoghurt would not have been a good idea!!!!….but fortunatly i made it to Cusco yesterday, despite feeling uber pants and today i have been able to eat normally again!

The next few days for me will be just getting used to the altitude and orientated to Cusco and then language school starts on Monday..which I am looking forward to!

I always knew that I would have to depend on God a lot more here, but I had no idea it would be this quick and with this much intensity!..as i said in my last blog, I have been challenged like never before, but now the fears and anxieties are less ( although still very much with me!), I am able to see and feel that God is with me and that He will see me through this, with many blessings on the way!! I give God all the glory for getting me through the last couple of weeks and so thankful to Him for providing me with amazing friends both here in Peru and at home…thankyou guys!!..you know who you are!! 🙂

So prayers for peace and a continued reduction in fear would be great!…and for nice weather!! :-)…but i guess you people reading this in the UK will have little sympathy for my bad weather situation, given what i have been hearing about over there!..it is just i  kinda got used to 25 degrees +  and lovely sunshine, being in Lima for 2 weeks!!

my first week!

Well, I have completed my first week of my adventure!!…I have to confess that this time last week, i did not think i would still be in Peru now!..i had made some pretty definate decisions that this was not for me and was working out what i was gonna be doing for the next 8 months in the UK with no job or place to live ( altho i could have put a tent up in my garden,  i am sure Monica would have let me use the bathroom every now and then!!)…BUT God is good and He has seen me through!! and I am still here!…It has been an incredibly tough week, and one I never want to relive, but I think and pray that i am beginning to come out the other side!…and have had some really fun times!!

The week has been filled with  country orientation from our team leaders Ruth and Paul!…we have had sessions on how to avoid being killed in a bus crash, how to avoid being mugged at knifepoint and how to increase your chances of surviving an earthquake!…so i feel very equipped now!! :-)…I have just decided to never leave the flat again!!…that is one way of keeping me here i suppose!!..No serioulsly, there were plenty of other sessions which were far less dramatic….like what to do when diahrea ( how is that spelt!) strikes!! We have also had some fun times too….going to Pinkberry, which is the most amazing frozen yoghurt place with the best toppings ever! We also went to a water park one evening, where they have amazing laser show though water ( that is really badly explained, but do not know how else to explain it!!)…just take my word for it…it was good!! – Lima is a really lovely city and Peruvians are such lovely people ( except the ones who mug you at knifepoint!!!)…yesterday i went down to the seafront at about 7.30 and got chatting ( term used loosely as he did not speak english so it was down to my very broken spanish!!) to a jogger…he was just so friendly and patient with my rubbish spanish!!

Anyway…tomorrow i will be joining Jenny and Roland and the boys as all Latin Linkers head of to an old convent for the annual Latin Link Peru confernce, then off to Cusco on Thursday!!…hope to not be affected by the altitude!!!

please, if you get a chance, pray for peace of mind for me..although i feel better today, i am still ‘fragile’ and get extremely homesick at times…but I have always known this was going to be a challenge, where I would really have to call on God, and boy, am i having to do that!!

But I am thanking God for great new friendships, fun times and frozen yoghurt!!!

hasta luego amigos!!!

ps..sorry no photos yet, due to general lack of motivation to take any, but promise to rectify that!!

the adventure begins!!

Well, here I am!…day 5 in Peru!….the journey was pretty non eventful…although there was a tense time when we were unsure whether we were gonna get our connecting flight in Madrid due to our flight from Heathrow leaving over an hour late!…but all good!…and even all our luggae made it too!..which is never a given when flying to Peru!!…so Praise God for that!!

The hostel we are staying in is lovely!…initially we had a horrible, cramped dark room, and due to jet lag and general tiredness, i lay on the bed and cried whilst my roomies slept, as i could not bear the thought of staying in this room for a week, but then 5 minutes later, there came a knock at the door and we were asked if we wanted to swap to a bigger room!!..praise God!..i cannot tell you how much better that made me feel…a small but incredibly significant thing..and it just reminded me that God really is with me!

anyway,  this was just a brief entry to say i am here and physically doing well!!….emotionally…well, that is a bit of a struggle..to be expected i guess. I am having to depend on God like never before, so that can only be a good thing!….prayers appreciated if you get a chance!!

by the way…to all you facebookers…if you could keep references to this blog very general on my ‘wall’ ( or not at all would be even better!!)as i have not given everyone my blog adress and i am not advertising the fact that i am struggling to everyone….not to be dishonest…just a self preservation thing i guess!!

muchos gracias amigos!! xxx

Boldly go…

So, this time 17  days time I will be sat in Madrid airport, having done the first leg of my flight to Peru!!….”Boldy go” is what is written on the back of my Latin Link hoodie!…this makes me smile because my approach to this trip is anything but bold!!…I know without fail that this is God’s plan for me for this year, but that does not stop the butterflies ( altho sometimes they feel more like bats!!) in my tummy everytime I think about the months ahead!…..That said, I am so excited about what God wants to do to me and how He wants to use me!

When I was in Cusco in September/October 2010, I felt that God would be taking me back there sometime…..so with much prayer and guidance from God, I have overcome many hurdles, both practical and emotional to get to this place where my return to Cusco is imminent!! I remember asking God on several occasions to close the door on my plans if it was not His will, and there were plenty of opportunities….in fact there was no way this trip was gonna be possible without His intervention!!..what was i going to do with my flat? How was I going to get the time off work? Where was the money going to come from?…all these hurdles well and truly cleared!!….the emotional hurdles…well, that was/is more challenging, BUT God is faithful and patient and kind, and this whole experience is teaching me to just trust in Him and allow Him to lead me, because his plans are to prosper me and not to harm me!!…and i have not even stepped on the plane yet!!!…so with that in mind….I guess i better prepare to boldly go!!!